She fell asleep for awhile. And i saw her dream of him. Even though the dream probably lasted only a couple of minutes, i know how miserably heavy her eyes, mind, heart felt after that dream.
And i realize she’s not completely over him.
It has been two years since she lay her eyes on his, and it has been four years since they had a proper conversation and it was only a couple of weeks ago where he clearly showed her, that she don’t matter, to him.
And i do feel sad for her. Pity even. I just don’t understand why is it hard for her to let go? I tried telling her time and time again, she has to stop. Find a way. Create a way. Make a way. Anything to not think. To not remember. He has moved on. Probably starting a new book(s) already but she’s still struggling, writing, trying to find a way to end her old yellowed torn book?
She told me she is really trying to let go of it all. Still, sometimes i feel like she’s not trying hard enough to forget. But whenever i tried to tell her, all she does, is keep quiet.
July 11, 2015